Maxims for a Young Woman

"Portrait of a Young Woman" Nathan Miller

A student recently asked me to contribute to a Mysteries project by sharing ten things I think a young woman growing up in today's world needs to know. I don't usually give advice, but I dashed off a few thoughts. 

Young women are one of our most valuable resources in today's world. Our future rises and falls on their vision, and their ability to create and sustain what the world will become. 

Heady stuff! Then I realized that another way to think of this assignment was to consider the advice I wish I was given in my teens, if I had been smart enough to listen to one of my elders (I wasn't). ​

So take these words of wisdom with a grain of salt, meaning consider them salty and well-worn. I've grown a lot since my teen years and most of the time in between has left me battered, world-weary, and a little ornery.

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Lessons to Live By:
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Learn to listen to your gut: trust your intuition and what your body is telling you above all other information. 

Choose habits that make you stronger, healthier, smarter. In the end, it's the things you do every day, consistently, that determine most of who you are. Those habits will guide you when things get tough or fall apart (and they always do).

You are the most important resource you have. Be thrifty, but not stingy, with yourself. 

Make a plan to get to where you want to go. If you don't know how to make a plan, find someone who can see the pathway to the goal. Then walk it. (Then make a new plan :)

Choose friends and lovers who help you become a better person. 

​Learn how to say no, set boundaries, communicate when you don't like something. All women struggle with this, and it's a lesson you will likely have to learn over and over in your life.​

"Portrait of Young Woman" Lorenzo di Credi

​Be of service to something bigger than yourself. It's the most effective way to be happy. ​

Return to the wild part of yourself every day (or as much as possible). Go beyond should and should not, right and wrong, roles and responsibilities and experience the true ground of your own being.

Be honest. And if you can't be honest, be real about that with the people you love.

Make it a habit to create something of beauty, either in the material or immaterial world. Beauty nourishes the spirit and will keep your heart young.

"Portrait of a Young Woman" Paul Gaugin